Veteran of the USENET wars

(Parody set to the tune of Veteran of the Psychic Wars by Blue Öyster Cult.)


You see me post, a veteran
of a thousand USENET wars.
I've been flaming on the groups so long
to the point I've become a troll.
And I'm young enough to P2P
and far too old to see
alt. [alt dot] groups and "me toos" in '93.
I'm not sure that there are any newbies left for me:

Don't let these flames go on,
it's time we had a break from it.
It's time we had some leave.
We've been fighting with our flames
We've been spamming out our brains
Oh, please don't let these flames go on.

You ask me why I'm angry
why I have killfiled you.
You call me an idiot [loser/twit/kook/lunatic/etc.]
and wait for me to respond to you.
But the war's still going on, D00D,
and there's no end that I know:
one of us must have the last word.
I can't say if we're ever gonna be free.

Don't let these flames go on,
it's time we had a break from it.
It's time we had some leave.
We've been fighting with our flames
We've been spamming out our brains
Oh, please don't let these flames go on.

You see me troll, a veteran
of a thousand USENET wars.
My flamebaits are spent at last
and my bandwidth is destroyed.
I have used up all my insults;
I've just become another roadkill.
OT posts are all I'm made of.
Did I hear you say that I'm a Nazi?

Don't let these flames go on,
it's time we had a break from it.
It's time we had some leave.
We've been fighting with our flames
We've been spamming out our brains
Oh, please don't let these flames go on.

Don't let these flames go on.
Don't let these flames go ONNNNNNNNNN.

Pseudointellectual ramblings || Ram Samudrala || me@ram.org